Desire
by Marawa
Summary: Kaka/Saku AU. After an awkward conversation in the hot-springs, Kakashi is left depressingly unsure of his position as Sakura's teacher. Sakura believes, maybe, that Kakashi just needs to loosen up.


"No thank you Ino, I'll see you some other time." Resting underneath her ear, Sakura spoke into her phone as she continued to brush her hair with her other hand. She continued to pull the bristles through her matted wet hair; she let out a soft grunt as the brush made its way towards her many split ends. "I'll make it up to you, promise." She said. She listened to Ino's sigh on the other side of the line and then the blonde's hesitation to leave the conversation where it was.

"Alright, if you're sure. I'll see you soon?" Ino replied. Sakura's attention was far focussed on her knotty hair rather than her friend's words as she sighed through the phone.

Sakura nodded, "Yeah, I have to go now. See you later." She said hanging up a moment later, she threw her phone to the side and watched it bounce across her bed like a skipping stone. She turned back to her mirror and scruffily tied up her hair with a plain red hairband. Finally she let her wet showering towel drop to the ground and pool at her feet.

When she was finally dressed in her plain t-shirt and trousers she opened her curtains and went into her kitchen where a hawk was waiting at her window, patiently awaiting her arrival. It pecked at the window as it waited. Sakura quickly opened the window, stretching over the kitchen sink and took the small scroll from the beak of the animal. With a hand she stroked the bird's dark chestnut fur and then waved it away to read her note. She sighed as she read its contents and placed it away inside one of her culinary drawers for safekeeping.

"Meow." Purred a small creature nuzzling up to Sakura's leg, she smiled lightly and bent down to stroke the spotted feline.

"You'll be alright here today, won't you? I shouldn't be back till late, I will leave your flap open, okay?" she said comfortingly. The black and white cat continued to snuggle up to Sakura's warm touch and then followed her around the house as she collected her things, ready for work. The distinctive purr of her little friend was audible on the other sound of the door, even when she closed it and locked it behind her.

Sakura's green eyes were bright in the shining summer rays. She smiled; at least she had made it out of the house today.

"Oh, Kami." She cursed hiding behind a pillar in the main market street of Konoha. She snuck a glance in the direction of a man who was wandering about the streets, when he was out of sight, Sakura could only sigh. It wasn't easy telling someone who worshipped the ground you walked upon that you just weren't interested. Especially if you had to tell that same person so many times over again, with the hint of hope in their eyes refusing to diminish.

She could at least praise Lee for having the decency not to bother her constantly, even as his constant adoration for her continued to grow daily. The man she hid from was nothing more than a pest. A fairly good looking one, but a pest was a pest. Sakura would have thought the battle she had just been in would be enough for the man to at least show her some sympathy, not lust.

Finally the stalker-man was gone, and when Sakura could finally compose herself, she kept walking.

She allowed herself to think of Ino again as she journeyed towards the hospital. Maybe she could do something for her friend and give her some reason not to call her whenever she was busy, but she could understand, she missed Ino too but she was just too busy to mess around as though they were twelve again.

Sliding the main door open of the hospital Sakura was met with familiar faces, she nodded and smiled at some co-worked and waved at Shizune as she saw her approaching down the opposite direction of the hallway. She walked towards a room with clear numbers marked upon the door and gently knocked until a nurse opened the door for her.

When she entered the room her attention was brought to the far side where in bed she saw a mop of silver hair sticking out from the sheets. She barely noticed the instantaneous smile the grazed her lips when she walked over. A gust of remembrance ran through her, it had been quite a long time.

Kakashi lay asleep on his back on a large single bed, a white hospital blanket covering his battered body. His arms were by his sides and his breathing was slow, a thin blanket rippling up and down as he inhaled and exhaled gently. The top of the sheet laid over the most part of his face leaving only his eyes visible. Though from what Sakura could clearly see, underneath, Kakashi's usual mask was still intact. The man looked peaceful.

She was then reminded of her younger self accompanied by Naruto as well as Sasuke. The three of them trying their very hardest to pry the second skin off of Kakashi's face and finally see what he could be hiding from the world. Maybe if she were as young as she was back then she'd had already started prying the mask off, leaving Kakashi helpless in his tattered state. The thought made her chuckle, they were so determined back then, and had little to worry about. She smiled; at least there had been a time when she was somewhat carefree. At least she had experienced somewhat of a childhood unlike some, no matter dangerous it had actually been.

Now as she thought back to her past adventures with team seven, it incessantly made her cringe. To think of how much danger they had all been in on their missions and the little thought any of them had given to the death that was just moments away from them at every turn.

Sakura hadn't seen much of team seven in a long time now, other than Sai who accompanied her on her multiple missions. Although she would see them from afar, she was always busy training with Tsunade and Naruto with Jiraiya. Sai at least, she was almost surprised they'd grown so close over the years, regardless of the many insults he had for her, waiting until she wasn't expecting them. He was learning, and her iron fist made sure to help that process.

She giggled. And the sound made Kakashi stir. He mumbled something and twisted his head her way, his eyes still shut as though he was in a deep sleep. Sakura cocked her head to the side and leaned closer his way to observe the man's face. There were some faint wrinkles around his tired eyes, underneath them laid deep grey bags that spoke of his over-exhaustion and that same thin scar that ran down his sharingan closed eye.

"Sakura." He breathed, Sakura held back an astonished gasp. She raised an unkempt pink eyebrow wondering how Kakashi could have sensed her presence after so many years. She leaned back and stood up straight and then Kakashi opened his normal eye to have a look around whilst keeping the other firmly shut. His eye slowly drifted her way once adjusting to the bright light peering through the blinds of the hospital room.

"So…I'm in heaven, right?" he finally said to her, his eyes roaming over her, "And angels…they all look like Sakura?" he asked. Sakura let out a small laugh and shook her head, humouring the poorly man. "How fortunate."

"Sadly, I can't say you're that lucky, Kakashi-sensei." Sakura said finally taking a seat by his bedside, "Welcome back." She said. She crossed one leg over her other and rested her arm on the arm of the chair. She stared at Kakashi intently. The door opened and a different nurse made her way through the room to open up the blinds. As light poured in Kakashi audibly winced.

"What a pity." He sighed comically; he turned his gaze to the ceiling above him. "So, purgatory?" Kakashi inquired. Sakura shook her head at Kakashi's joke and mused to herself how a man who had been through so much pain was making casual jokes. _He's coping. _She couldn't say she'd been expecting to hear his usual aloof wit in this kind of state. However, her former sensei always continued to amaze her. In more ways than one.

The door swang open and hit the wall on the other side, both Kakashi and Sakura turned to see who it was.

"You, lucky bastard!" Tsunade said loudly, Sakura grinned at the Hokage's brashness. The pigtailed woman had both her arms pressed against the doorway and had a menacing glare in her chocolate brown eyes. And once Sakura saw this, she could decipher, Tsunade was not in a joking mood.

"What do I owe the pleasure, Tsunade-sama?" Kakashi said tiredly. At the copy-ninja's tone, Tsunade marched her way towards him. Sakura could only watch what was to unfold next. She rested her chin against her palm.

"You should be dead." Tsunade said bitterly, her hands on her hips. Her curvy form filled the room. Sakura frowned and wondered what Kakashi had done to earn such bitterness during his steady recovery.

"I am deeply sorry to disappoint you, Tsunade-sama." He replied sincerely.

"Stop with the jokes, Hatake." Tsunade said suddenly, and with this, tension arose in the room from nowhere. Sakura sat up straight and then stood. "You know very well what I have to say to you Hatake."

"Then with all due respect, Tsunade-sama, I don't need to be told what kind of predicament I am in." _I think I may be missing something? _Sakura thought shifting about slightly from one foot to the other. "I feel awful, which means my condition is at least just as bad."

Tsunade was unamused.

"Sakura." Tsunade said.

"Hai!" Sakura replied, jumping to attention.

"Come with me." Tsunade left the room and Sakura trailed behind her.

"Hai, Tsunade-shishou."

Tsunade walked through the hallway for a second, Sakura only followed her wondering to herself what duty would be bestowed on her next.

"Is his condition serious, shishou?" Sakura finally asked. Although she expected beforehand that Kakashi would be in serious trouble due to his overuse of the sharingan, to the extent of his pain she was still very unsure. And it was up to Shizune and Tsunade to inform her of his problems.

It was a foreign sight to see Kakashi in such a state. And she could tell by his will that he wouldn't complain of the pain he was experiencing even if it were dire.

"All I can really say is that he should be recovering slowly in bed for the next few months but knowing that man he won't stay here long," Tsunade answered angrily, "The minute he has use of his legs he'll try and leave. Do you have any idea how bad that makes me look? I think maybe I should cut them off…one by one…hmm…"

"Tsunade-shishou, I'm sure that won't be necessary." The woman sighed heavily.

"I want you to watch him." she said.

There was a pause and then Sakura opened her mouth to speak, she sucked in a breath, "With all due respect Tsunade-shishou, Kakashi-sensei doesn't take kindly to people following him." Without even confronting Kakashi in so long, Sakura knew these words to be law. Plus, Kakashi couldn't stay in the same place for long and she could imagine that the years they had spent apart hadn't changed his bad habits such as his constant lateness.

"I haven't asked you to follow him - _that_ word came from your vocabulary. Just, keep an eye on Hatake for me. I don't need him running himself into a ditch, because I'm not digging him out of it. Got it?" Tsunade said, Sakura nodded quickly and the woman again frowned, "If he does, I'll just get the ugliest nurse in the village to heal him, and give him a full physical. Actually, I like that idea." The woman mused. She collected herself and then looked Sakura up and down.

"And what _are _you wearing?" Tsunade breathed, she turned before Sakura could reply and shook her head as she walked down the corridor and out of sight.

"Yeah…thanks shishou." Sakura sighed, there was a curve on the side of her lip yet she was not smiling. She sighed, she better go and make herself useful elsewhere as it seemed Tsunade had no work for her today.

* * *

Sakura walked out of the hospital and looked up, it was still bright. She sighed; she really was a workaholic like Ino had said. But it just didn't feel right when she wasn't at work doing something to help a patient or Tsunade herself.

Walking back to her apartment, Sakura struggled to think of how she could spend the rest of her day. And then she saw Yamato and Sai approaching her way, a grin grew across her face.

"Yamato-sensei!" Sakura said hugging the tall brown haired man. He smiled at her and accepted her hug by pulling her closer to him. Yamato, like Kakashi, she hadn't seen much of at all in the time they had been separated. Regardless of the few times she had seen glimpses of her former teammates it was just nice to see such a positive face in the form of a former teacher. She smiled into his shoulder as she felt him do the same to her.

"Ugly." Sai's empty smile knew no bounds; Sakura nodded his way in acknowledgment and thought for a second about their vastly improving relationship.

"How is the great copy-ninja?" Yamato asked, worrying of his friend.

"Not good but better than we anticipated," she replied thinking back, "Are you two on your way to see him?" she asked cheerfully. Sai nodded.

Yamato looked up to the sky. "Naruto was with Jiraiya last time I saw him, he should be coming to see Kakashi soon." He informed her. Sakura could only nod.

"That's good." She replied.

Sakura then smiled to show Yamato she was acknowledging him, but their small talk was most uncomfortable and soon with a few goodbyes, they parted ways.

* * *

Kakashi peered out from the white hospital sheet resting atop his tender body. Shifting his eyes around so much only made his head throb more, he needed to get out of this place. He refused to be treated like an invalid any longer. Using his fierce determination to return to the comfort of his own home, Kakashi lifted himself with an achy groan. His sharingan eye ached twice as much as the other but he refused to lay down again.

He sighed and took a moment in the same position to collect himself, his breathing was hardly controlled but he knew what was best for himself and that was to leave as soon as physically possible. He only hoped a nurse wouldn't come to bother him with their pitiful hospital meals anytime soon. And as soon as Tsunade found out he had left, she'd have a warrant for his immediate order to return to the hospital – one he knew he'd have trouble wiggling his way out of.

He swung his legs around the side of the bed and looked up to see the chair Sakura had been sitting in just a few moments ago. He sighed and looked down to the cold floor. After collecting his clothes from the small cupboard in the corner of the room he took one last look at the room he had been treated in for some time now, it felt like a prison, especially considering how much care Tsunade had place around him. It was as though he was being held captive by his injuries and Tsunade herself.

He could barely breathe. He walked over to the window.

And before long, the copy-nin was gone.

* * *

As Yamato emerged from the misty changing room he was greeted by the salute of Kakashi who was easing his aching muscles into the hot spring. Yamato leaned against the door frame and crossed his arms, "You know, this really isn't such a good idea Kakashi." He chuckled, shaking his head.

"Although, it's been such a while since I've just let loose and relaxed." He said rubbing the back of his neck and joining Kakashi.

"Maybe you should, more often." Kakashi breathed, he placed his arms behind his head and slowly sunk into the soothing hot water. He winced slightly, accidently letting out a small sound of exasperation and pain. Yamato approached the water and shook his head once more.

"If you need me to take you back-" Yamato spoke quickly.

"I'm quite alright, Yamato. Your job is to keep me company." Kakashi said dreamily.

"I'm honoured." Yamato laughed weakly and then cleared his throat as though to start up a proper conversation. Kakashi seemingly didn't take the hint and only sunk lower into the water surrounding him.

It wasn't too dark but the lack of light from the hot sun gave insight to what time of night it actually was, the temperature dropped slightly but the two men could barely feel any difference.

"So…" Yamato started.

"Hmm?" Kakashi said, not moving but letting an eye crack open to view his companion.

"How have you been? It's been a long time since we got back, since we've all been together, how are you feeling?" Yamato asked. Kakashi shifted about slightly, and for a moment Yamato believed Kakashi may actually answer him. Yamato ran a hand through his short brown hair and sighed, "You must be exhausted still." He added.

"How is Asuma?" Kakashi suddenly asked, "Not smoked himself into a coma yet?" there was no humour in the man's voice; Yamato suddenly felt a rush of unease.

"He's good. Been spending a lot of time with Kurenai, you know?" he said, hinting of the two's relationship. A small smile crept onto Kakashi's masked lips and a trickle of sweat ran down his forehead.

"Naruto's been asking for you." Yamato said, hoping this would be another conversation starter.  
"That's nice." Kakashi answered.

"You know, if you don't want me here, I can leave." Yamato said seriously this time, there was a slight hurt in his voice that Kakashi could instantly detect. Kakashi turned to him and shook his head.

"I apologise Yamato." He said, "How have you been?" he asked.

"Alright-ish. Recovering from that mission of course, I've been on a few since, but only small ones." He said, Kakashi nodded, "I haven't seen much of team seven though, other than Sai who's been with me much everywhere. Naruto's pretty busy with his training, I'm proud of him."

Kakashi smiled under his mask and nodded. "I am too." he said, "Although I'll never tell him." he leaned back into the warm water.

"Sakura too." Yamato added. There was a pause before Yamato decided to continue, "She's been worried about you, you know?"

"I never realised." Kakashi responded wryly.

"Well, she did go to visit you at the hospital, did she not?" Yamato asked him.

"Yes, but only to see how much longer I'd last." Kakashi said dryly.

Yamato laughed and leaned back against the warm rippling water, "You know, sometimes your sense of humour isn't that funny?"

"I wasn't making a joke." Kakashi replied quietly.

"Sometimes it's hard to believe how grown up they've all become." Yamato said dreamily, he looked up to the moon that now rose above his head casting a shimmering reflection against the hot spring water.

"Well, Naruto has…matured in some ways." Kakashi said, Yamato laughed and nodded. "And I know that Sasuke's absence is hard on them, but they're doing good to get by."

"Sakura's been off with Tsunade a lot, working in the hospital, going on missions and helping her out with her paperwork. We all know how much Tsunade can't stand it all." Yamato said, "Sakura…she's a lot like Tsunade, she's stronger than she was just months ago. She's a fast learner too."

"You sound like one unlucky admirer." Kakashi remarked sarcastically. Yamato instantly turned to him wide-eyed and gave his friend a look as though he was slightly shocked, and then he collected himself and looked off into the distance. "A bit like Lee."

"Unlucky yes, Sakura's a beautiful young woman," he said suddenly, "Don't you think?" he said turning his attention back to Kakashi, eager to see his reaction to the question he'd been asked.

"I don't look at Sakura in that way, Yamato." His tone was something odd, almost as though he had said this purposely in such a way to make Yamato feel bad about what he had said. Yamato swallowed.

"In what way?" Yamato said defensively, "You'd have to be blind not to see she is maturing gracefully."

"And now you sound like Gai when he's quoting love stories."

"Are you telling me you don't think Sakura is beautiful?" when he received no reply he took that as his signal to continue defending his case, "Sometimes I would wonder what Naruto and Lee saw in her, it isn't hard to spot anymore." He smiled finally.

"Sakura is naught but a child, there isn't much to observe."

"That's not what I thought the last time I saw her wearing a bathing suit." Yamato remarked putting his hand behind his head and leaning on them lazily. That comment, at last, got Kakashi's attention. Yamato could feel the sharingan wielder's eyes on him, watching him closely like a predator stalking its prey.

Suddenly the silver haired ninja rose, water trickled along his body back into the pool.

"Where are you off to?" Yamato asked plainly, the tone is his voice suggesting he knew Kakashi was likely to give him an answer full of riddles, or one not at all. Kakashi briefly turned back to face Yamato.

He disappeared leaving a cloud behind, he said, "To forget myself."

* * *

After a round of drinks with Genma, Kakashi found himself being tugged into a bathroom stall by a slender, busty blonde. The scent of alcohol was strong on her clothes as well as her breath as she nipped the corner of Kakashi's ear with her teeth. She groaned as Kakashi's fingertips worked their magic around her lower back. She arched towards him, coaxing him to do more.

As he pushed her back against one of the walls she sighed with lust and rested her chin on his shoulder, allowing him full control.

Kakashi hoisted her up against one of the parallel walls of the narrow cubicle, the woman sighed in ecstasy once more before her fingers crept towards Kakashi's zipper. His fingers reached her as pulled back from her, "Not in a dirty cubicle." He said just before he teleported the two of them out of the restroom to a street just a few streets away from his own apartment.

When the woman finally noticed what had happened she ran a hand through her dishevelled hair. She flashed Kakashi and crooked smile and then took his hand for him to lead her off for an end to a good night of partying. Using his well-rehearsed charm, Kakashi took the woman around to the next street; she clung to him close as he spoke sweet saccharine words to her.

Kakashi exhaled and lead the woman through the dark streets, and then he stiffened all of a sudden. "Something wrong?" the woman asked.

Kakashi cleared his throat, muffling most of the sound under his hand. The woman frowned at Kakashi. "Another time." He said. The woman pouted but eventually let go of Kakashi's hand, only to blow him a kiss and give him one last flirtatious look and her number, just in case he wanted to finish what they had started another time.

Kakashi stalked through the street making no sound. He watched carefully as Sakura approached her house, he frowned a little. _Why is she out so late? _He longed to reach out to her, say something.

And then he watched finally as Sakura disappeared into her home, he rebuked the temptation to follow her.

* * *

_A/N:__ Expect the next chapter to be longer :) Please leave a review. _


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